Be Nice

What did we learn last week, little conservative kiddies?

Well, we learned from Nikki Haley, after Obama’s State Of Confusion Address, that conservatives shouldn’t be mad or support any angry GOP contenders like .. uh … Donald Trump.

That’s right, little children. You’d better squelch that rage because Nikki, Lindsey and Jeb don’t like it, and to them it’s counter-intuitive to winning elections. Do you think their rebuke of The Donald is based upon the fact that they couldn’t draw Trump’s crowds if they gave out free beer and hookers? We may never know. Anyway…

Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t McCain and McRomney peddle that same “be nice” McCrap tactic in ’08 and 2012, Mrs. Haley? How’d that work out for us, huh? Google that, Nikki, and get back to me.

Look, I hate to break it to the governor from SC, who begged money from Trump when she was clamoring for that job, but for your information, people are pissed and Trump’s massive rallies and Jeb’s and Lindsey’s underwhelming events prove the nation shares Donald’s rage regarding how BHO has decimated this nation.

Telling us to calm down is like telling the patriots in 1773 to chill out. You’re way out of touch, sister.

Oh, and by the way, I don’t remember your saying shizzle about Al Sharpton’s demented rhetoric when you shared a stage with that tax-evading, slick-haired, hate merchant. Why didn’t you chastise him when you were hugging him, since you’re now the self-appointed Rage-Aholic Rebuke Queen?

 

As most of you know by now, I ain’t buying Haley’s “be calm” hash she’s slinging. I think it’s a time for anger and, therefore, I prefer Nikki Sixx to Nikki Haley because I don’t think, as our pacified RINO losers believe, that anger is naughty. Matter of fact, I think anger is a must in this mucked America; and here’s why:

Anger, like alcohol, is only bad if it’s abused. However, if used for right reasons and in right amounts (as the inspired Psalmist once said about wine), it can “make the heart merry.” Anger might not make you glad as quickly as a second glass of Merlot can, but if channeled correctly, it will make you giddy about something you desire, but can’t get—until you get angry.

For example: say you’re an unemployed, 28-year old guy who does nothing but sit on your butt playing video games, smoking weed, living with mommy and dating 19-year old girls and guys. You know what? You should get angry with yourself because you, clearly, aren’t the coldest beer in the fridge. You do not have a life, and it should make you mad that other people are actually productive—unlike you.

Need another example? Say you’re overweight. Remember what it used to be like to walk across Walmart’s parking lot without having to be gurneyed to your minivan by Randy Mantooth? Remember the joy of not being able to hide small toys and half-eaten sandwiches between the folds of blubber on your body; and being able to actually see the toilet when you use it? Remember those simple pleasures? You do? Does it make you mad that you don’t get to enjoy them any longer? It does?!? There you go . . . see how positive anger can be?

Folks, this righteous wrath not only works for personal improvement, but it can also change for the better all aspects of our society—if we’ll get righteously P.O.’d in a precise direction. And there’s the rub . . . Our neutered nation tells us it’s a big no-no to get mad anymore. Especially if you’re a conservative.

That’s right, being angry is forbidden in our currently castrated culture—unless it’s something that the liberal thought police thinks you should be ticked at, and then you’re forced to fume also or you’re . . . you’re . . . you’re a . . . a Nazi!

Nowadays, we’ve been forced to memorize this mantra of postmodernism that being nice and accepting of anything and everything—even if it is utter, uncut and unmitigated BS—is our duty. And it just so happens that BS is the chief characteristic of our society these days. We’re inundated with it, but not supposed to be upset by it, which is convenient if you are the seller of it.

 

Because we have allowed ourselves to be programmed by “them” to be nice and not heat up (unless, again, it is at something that upsets the left), we don’t even blink an eye when we see the base and the vile; instead we force a smile. What a bunch of bunkum we’ve been sold vis-à-vis this whole uninterrupted “nice” wave we’ve been told we’re supposed to surf. Today, people can do something appalling, say something contemptible and delve down the funnel exalting the lowest parts of humanity—and what’s to be our response? We’re supposed to stay sedate.

So, why do we show mock civility towards things that mock civility? Well, because “anger is bad.” And we don’t want to be bad, do we? No, we want to be nice. We’re supposed to be a chilled-out group of pleasant and complicit prawns who do the Miss America wave no matter what kind of insanity gets shoved in our faces, up our tail pipes or down our throats.

We’ve got to get P.O.’d, people, or our nation is going to be unrecognizable. We must meet those with anti-American sentiments and their insanity everywhere they raise their garlic-knotted heads and solidly beat them on their own turf. Otherwise, the things we love as traditional Americans are going to end up as relics in a museum in a pathetic shell of a country. (Doug Giles)

 

Now when to Fold them

Beating Queen Hillary is Job 1. Period. The rest of this crap…not so much.

It’s time to say “Goodbye,” and in some cases “Good riddance,” to the asterisks, the footnotes, and the jokes running in the GOP primary. No, not a single vote has been cast, but the outlines of the real race are coming clearly into view. You have the kind-of-establishment candidates (Rubio, Christie), the sort-of-insurgents (Fiorina, Carson, Cruz), and Donald Trump. The nominee is in that bunch, and defeating that malignant, pant-suited monster is more important than stroking the inexplicably inflated egos of the others. Time for the players at the $2 a hand table to fold and add their voters back into the pot.

Look at Bush III. He was sitting on $100 million in ad money and all it has done is made sure everyone knows what a loser he is. “Chaos Candidate” – who told you that catchphrase was going to hurt Trump? The same brain trust that told you to hang a medal around Hillary’s neck? To support Common Core? To describe the unlawful acts of the illegal immigrants who are causing real economic and criminal pain to real Americans as an “act of love?” Your whole campaign has been an act of love.

Sheesh, chaos is why people like Trump. Your donor class, let’s-wave-at-the-unwashed-plebes-through-the-limo-window campaign is dead. Deal with it. Remember Mean Girls and the term “fetch?” Jeb, stop trying to make you happen. You’re not going to happen.

 

Rick Santorum, why are you even running? Here’s a thought: Dudes kissing is not a priority when we have a gargoyle poised to seize the White House on a platform expressly devoted to undoing the First, Second, and probably the Third Amendment – hell, every Amendment except the Fifth, which she really, really digs.

Mike Huckabee, you’re a beefy, white preacher from Arkansas – not exactly the face of today’s GOP except in every single Democrat meme ever. You don’t have a candidacy. You have a performance art piece that is some sort of bizarre tribute to Boss Hogg from Dukes of Hazzard.

Rand Paul, you have important things to do – like winning your Senate seat again and speaking up for the 50% of the libertarian agenda that isn’t batstuff crazy.

Jim Gilmore, sheesh. I never thought I’d say this in any context, but follow Lindsey Graham’s example and have some freaking dignity.

Then there’s John Kasich. Your candidacy seems to be built entirely upon two pillars – that you can deliver must-win Ohio and that Republican voters are wrong about everything they believe in and need you to tell them that. Well, I don’t think you can deliver Ohio, but if you can then that’s all you should be focusing on, not this quixotic quest for an office no one in your party wants you to have. John, I liked you better in 2012 when your last name was “Huntsmen.” Actually, that’s not true – you were a smug, annoying loser then too.

What’s left gives us Republicans three distinct categories to choose from. Marco Rubio has effectively moved into the establishment GOP column, replacing Jeb while still maintaining his contacts in the insurgent wing. He seems to have the most solid foreign policy ideas and he is polling best against Hillary, but he has two distinct weaknesses. First, his immigration screw-up remains screwed-up despite our pleas for him to fix it. Marco, you will never get my primary vote, or the primary votes of millions of other people, until you make it unequivocally clear that no one who came here illegally will ever, ever, ever, become a U.S. citizen without going home, starting over, and immigrating lawfully. Anything else is amnesty and don’t you dare start arguing with me – a voter and your boss – about what amnesty is.

The second problem is caution. Rubio has some solid advisors, but he has also inherited some establishment losers who will counsel hesitation and caution where raw aggression is what’s called for. Like with Hillary’s sick record of trashing the women Bill abused; the majority of Rubio’s advisors will never let Rubio unleash on that fat, juicy target. Rubio will be under pressure to play it safe and submissive, and if he takes it, the Democrat Dominatrix will flog him in November.

Chris Christie is also in the Establishmentish column, but he’s now hugging conservatism like he hugged Obama. No, we won’t forget, but if he can get us to trust him to actually do the things he says he’s for now, but manifestly was not before – like supporting our sacred right to keep and bear arms – then he might have a shot.

 

On the insurgent side, the side explicitly running against the ossified, unjustifiably smug GOPe gang that brought us victory in 2008 and 2012, you have Carly Fiorina. She’s always interesting on stage, and she might find a way to break through again. Then there’s Dr. Carson, who still has a lot of voters in his corner (but less than before). His main selling point is that he’s a nice man. This is also his weakness – in 2016, we need someone who delights in the destruction of our opponents, and the good doctor doesn’t seem like an enemy-crushing and hearing-the-lamentations-of-the-women kind of guy.

Finally, there’s the anti-establishment big dog, Ted Cruz. Cruz is working on his personality problem – he can be off-putting because he’s so smart, but he is a super effective advocate for conservative ideas. In fact, his speeches are all red meat. Which is not good enough – I’m pretty confident I can tell you where Cruz comes down on the issues. What I want to hear from him is how he intends to win 270 electoral votes. Exactly which states can Cruz turn from blue to red in November? And how will he do it? As an infantry officer, I learned that operations are relatively simple; logistics are hard and if you don’t have that down you lose no matter how awesome you are at moving pieces on a map. We know why you should be president; you need to show us how you can become president.

And then there’s Donald Trump. I don’t see him as a big logistics guy, mostly because logistics (like setting up an Iowa caucus turnout machine) isn’t fun or shiny. But he’s got a lot of people who support him and he’s driving messages the GOP needs, like “illegal immigration is bad because it hurts normal Americans” and “Hillary is a cruel, hypocritical monster who personally ratified and enabled the sexual depredations of her pervert husband.”

Someone in these three categories is going to be the GOP nominee, and I’m voting for him or her in November. Now we need to figure out who it will be, and the also-rans need to free their voters to find the real nominee. The ones in it for the good of the country will, and when they see that this is not their year they will free their voters to help make that choice (Kudos to Governors Walker, Perry, Jindal, and Pataki). If your candidacy isn’t going anywhere, it’s time to get your asterisk out of the race. (Kurt Schlichter)